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I Would
Rather Have
One Breath Of Her Air,
One Touch Of Her Skin,
For A Moment,
Then To Live Through Eternity Without Her.
My Dreams,
My Thoughts,
My Actions,
Can Never Take Me To Her Again,
So I Wait...
You could see how hard Doctors were working to
find a cure for these little children. Their dedicated loyalty to children
and humanity could never be described with words on this page. Their research
was not just confined with one hospital they were constantly seeking
alternatives, corresponding with other hospitals, surgeons and research
personnel. I learned the meaning of HOPE and how to move forward during
setbacks by having the honor and privilege of knowing these fine surgeons
personally.
In her struggle to understand why this could
happen, Rose became a model for other children to follow. During the last ten
months of her life, her tiny body transformed from that of a healthy normal
child that you see in the picture above, to a frail fragile body, having lost
the use of her body.
This page is to salute Rose for her unwillingness
to give-up helping other children who seek hope while being confined to a
hospital and losing the freedom of playing in the local playground with other
children, she volunteered to care for other cancer stricken children. She
became a companion to other children who had no family to visit them or play
with them for their last remaining days on this planet. She disregarded her
own pain both physical and emotional to mentor to other children.
The staff of Queens General Hospital noticed how these children would cling to Rose, demanding
her full and constant attention while they wept through their pain and
sickness.
The last two weeks of Rose's life was more pain
than she could bare. Physicians were unable to feed IV's through her veins in
her little arms or legs because her body was destroyed. She would still
insist on helping the Doctors and Staff with painful test.
She explained "I'm going help other
little baby children not to get sick like me."
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Although Rose lost all her hair and had no
strength to walk any longer, or even sit, she still managed to show her hope
for others when she lost her beautiful long thick brown hair from
chemotherapy and radium treatments by showing other children that she wasn't
afraid, and that there is hope for all. She helped them to exist with their
daily pain and understand how much they are loved by all us. Her faith as a
child was unsurpassed. She gave more to others than life had given to her.
The last hours of Rose's life was in an alternate
state of consciousness and unconsciousness. When she awoke her words and
thoughts were of "who's going to take care of the sick babies when I
leave?". She knew at the age of 3 that she was dying. So much morphine
was shot into her frail little body to help ease the pain that she was going
through. We watched her cry in her pain. Yet Rose never complained saying Why
Me, or This Isn't Fair. She just laid in her bed losing consciousness
enduring the pain.
During the last moments of her life that precious
little child for the last time looked at her mother and said "I'm not
afraid to die mommy, but, I'm going to miss my babies" pointing to her
little friends in the cubicles next to her bed who were also victims of this
terrible disease that strikes children. She then kissed her mother and told
her she loved her and closed her eyes for the last time. We stared at her.
She was breathless. Her battered little body gave up. She was in peace now,
we could see this. I noticed that Rose's friends, the Surgeons and Nurse's
hurrying to her bed to be there for her, during her last moments of life,
break down and cry.
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We were all so attached emotionally to this brave
and precious little child.
Most important, I should mention Rose's mother.
She is quite an amazing woman. For everyday, seven days per week, she
would arrive at the hospital every morning at 6am to be there for Rose, so that when she woke up, Rose would
see her mother next to her bedside. She would leave after midnight, so that Rose would fall asleep feeling safe in her
mother's arms. Rose's mother had this uncanny strength to be there for
her daughter. Rose's mother was strong, while hiding her own pain inside,
always with a smile and always showing her unique and strength of her love.
I have always admired, and will always love
Rose's mother, I miss her so much... Through Linda's strength, endurance, and
stamina, I believe that Rose was able to endure all her pain and suffering
because of her mother's strength and dedicated love. This woman, I
will always remember and honor with utmost admiration and respect, she is
truly a wonderful and kind person. It's an honor to have been
loved by her.
I watched such dedicated and sensitive Surgeons
cry upon her death. I seen how hard they worked to help our daughter survive.
I admire and honor them all. Honorable mention with sincere respect goes out
to all those Doctor's, Nurse's, and hospitals administrators who every day
fight the battle of cancer to Save Our Children from this terrible disease
When I
Close My Eyes To Sleep,
I Say, Goodnight Rose.
When I Awake,
I Look For Her.
Everyday.
Through The Years
The Loneliness Grows.
I'm Tired…
Wanting To Go To Her.
I Stare At Her Photo,
Visualize Her, In My Mind,
Holding Her,
Feel Her Touch,
Gaze Into Her Eyes,
I Surrender My Spirit.
Her Little
Arms Grasp Around My Neck,
Feeling Her Tender Cheek Touch My Face,
My Imagination Takes Over,
And For A Moment;
We Unite,
No Sound,
I Sense Her Spirit Pass Through My Soul,
Nirvana, And So I Wait
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